The crack beneath the rolls of electrical tape continued to grow. A day after our quick remedy made the electric fan stand again, it began to tilt dangerously low that the threat of the home appliance splitting in half became a worrisome fact.
In two days, the base of the switch box was torn to shreds. I had to anchor the entire unit to the TV cabinet or the motor and the blades will fall apart. A replacement is needed fast. Having a room notorious for its searing heat meant sleeping soaked in sweat.
I might not be able to sleep at all.
So there I was at SM Centerpoint at noon the next day. Pretty strange for someone who refuses to be seen in such places at that time of the day. There were so many brands to choose from - 3D, Standard, Camel, - even the thought of buying the pricey aircon briefly crossed my mind.
Until I was held back by the hefty electrical bill, which we would have to pay every month as a consequence.
In the end, I settled to acquire a Nikon electric fan. The friendly attendant stressed its five blades blasting stronger winds that cool the air better than other brands. Having to pay on credit was my idea, but leaving the credit card at home meant a depletion of my cash reserves.
Until now, I fear checking my balance.
The new fan was meant for my room. It is an attempt to fix things, so that despite the soul's brokenness - I will be reminded of my recovery. But I had other plans in mind. Knowing that there's a room in the house, whose occupant has to endure far more scorching heat that what I suffer in my quarters. Inner healing meant the relief of others.
Solace comes in the form of love.
"Kuya Pet," I called the house help's attention. "Pagdating sa bahay, paki assemble naman itong electric fan"
We were in the car. The lesbian driver (who has returned thank heavens) tried to plot a short cut to avoid the build up of cars in front of us.
"Punta lang ako sa pagawaan para paayos tong nasira kong fan." The house help listened to every word I said. "Pag na-assemble mo na, pakidala sa room ni Mama."
"Sa akin muna yung electric fan niya."