The Beginning Is The End | Morning Praises




4:00 AM

The last thing I remember is having a nasty argument with my mother, a verbal tussle that has not happened yet in real life, over her insistence to cross a craggy ledge. The drop below is simply too difficult to fathom. And just when we both agreed to let her sit on a man-sized skateboard, which I would gently push across the narrow passage, I was kicked out of dreamland, never to find sleep again just two hours after saying goodnight to my partner.

And so begins my two-day calvary. The day when my body clock gets distorted leaving me languishing in forced wakefulness and languid at work. For the past several days, I sleep just when the sun appears on the horizon. Today, I will have to bear an entire day (and half a night) before I could adjust my body clock again to its normal and original spin.

6:00 AM

"Miss Guidotti, we need to talk."

Stunned, the agent followed me inside the conference room.

"How do I say this," I began in a sombre tone.

"Today is our last day and we have 74 more items to upload."

"74 na lang!?!" I smiled. The agent's face, on the other hand spoke of disbelief.

"I just want you to know that without your dedication, your long hours of extended work, the completion of this project might have been delayed for a week."

"And I want you to know how grateful I am to work with you."



Lao Tzu once said "that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." And here we are, wrapping up that project that we hope could turn the tide and change the fate of the company. As I said before, I honestly think that I'm not fit to lead. I get distracted, I easily panic and I hardly command the respect once given to those lieutenants before me.

But gone are the days when we could boast a hundred seats occupying the floor, and I am just a remnant of a once-sprawling organization that provided jobs to hundreds of people. Reluctantly, I took the challenge believing it was my atonement. We toiled day and night just to keep up with the deadline. The director didn't know what happens as he finds new ways to make business, while we, who stayed behind made sure everything runs according to his wishes.

"Sana hindi ka masyadong na-stress sa akin." I told the agent.

"Hindi naman sir, gusto ko nga yung pressure eh." He chuckled.

I once read that true leaders lead by example and they've seen it from me, staying long hours in the office, sometimes even working at home just to let them know that I'm on top of the situation. For some, it was madness, considering that most managers simply give instructions or push their minions forward using more draconian means.

But I've learned that there's a better way of doing things. Something that puts fire in people's bellies more than fear, graceless words or pressure can ever do.

"When you return to your workstation, let your accomplishment be your inspiration ha?" I said.

"And let's hope the client chooses us to manage the next phase of this project."

Monday begins with kind words said to people so it may empower their spirit. I just hope I can deliver the same rousing call, once my other agent arrives later this morning.



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