Im going natural. Im so excited about the freedom that comes with wearing my hair the way it grows out of my scalp. "my hair has held me back from freely enjoying the simple pleasures in life (swimming, dancing in the rain, shower sex, etc.). It kept me always slightly insecure & self-conscious. &, if I was being honest, my chemically processed hair kept me feeling inadequate & slightly miserable throughout most of my life." -my sentiments exactly apricot tea.
When I think about it my hairs upkeep, I see that its a little ridiculous. The solon visits include: perms every three mounts & touch ups every month and a half as well as cutting every visit. The daily upkeep includes: wash, rinse, repeat, blow dry, flat iron every week & style everyday. I've realizing how much of an expensive and time consuming ritual this is...and for what, why have I been taught to hate my hair, to cover it, to fear it, to straighten it the moment it grows from my scalp? Is it to conform what I see portrayed as beautiful in the media, to have "manageable hair". Well, you know what, I can be just as attractive and self confident with my natural hair.
I have cut my hair off once before, (I was nearly bald then) so, I have had the opportunity to experienced my hair's natural state. It was refreshing, and easy, [I mean I could just jump into the shower without a cap at anytime of the day]. I loved it. The problems was that I didn't feel attractive, never mind beautiful. I couldn't deal with the In between period. Transitioning from relaxed to natural hair is not easy at all. When I first did it in collage, guys who were falling at my feet, begging to spend time with me prior to my natural short cut, avoided my eyes after it. Even my current boyfriend told me he preferred my relaxed hair back then.
Watching the movie BAD HAIR with my boyfriend - planted the natural hair seed in my head over half a year ago and that seed has now grown into a full blown flower. Watching that movie opened my eyes to so many things but mainly that the main ingredient in relaxers is sodium hydroxide, thinking about putting chemicals on top of my scalp now and possibly causing brain damage discuses, disturbs and saddens me. So this morning I took the scissors into the rest room with me, and cut off all the relaxed hair from the back of my head. Its a start, when I get back to Atlanta I will pay my hair stylist a visit & this time I will gradually go into natural hair & try my best to keep it that way.